parenting

I’m Recovered!

Join me on LIVE with Olivia Gordon, discussing addiction & recovery. Olivia is the Founder & Principal Consultant at We Are Fruit of Life. Fruit of Life provides families with mediation and consultative guidance through the process of restoring their family dynamics after they have been affected by addiction. We are discussing reclaiming our lives after the disruption of addiction. http://www.wearefruitoflife.com

I’m Recovered!

olivia gordon promo for site

parenting

Why Won’t She Sleep?!

anissa sleepEverybody tells you to sleep when the baby sleeps. That’s the advice new moms get when they have a fresh bundle of joy, but what are you to do as a seasoned mom with a 5-year-old who doesn’t sleep?! I was seriously starting to believe that Anissa was sneaking energy drinks before bed. I’d heard start a routine, once she gets use to the routine she’ll be asleep in no time. So what did I do, I set the alert on my phone to start our routine, 1. take a bath, while in the bath read bedtime story, 2. lotion up give a gentle massage while helping put them to bed to help them relax, 3. Lights out no distractions, turn off the lights, tv, tablet, whatever, they should be in a completely dark room and in about 10 minutes they’ll be sleep. THIS WAS ALL A LIE!

Now what I wrote above may work for some, but it did not work for my youngest precious gift from above. She would sleep for about 20 minutes and then be up late into the night TALKING TO ME WHILE I WAS TRYING TO SLEEP. At first I blamed school, her nap time was too long so of course she wasn’t sleepy, then I blamed all the other people in the house, they were too loud, they kept her too excited. I felt like I was never going to sleep again. I think an adult lacking sleep is worse than a kid who gets no sleep, I was beyond cranky at work. So what’s a mom to do…settle in and just accept that sleep and I are no longer friends OR take action.

I studied this little girl. I needed to know exactly what she did prior to our routine so that I could see if there was something I could use to help me. I discovered her playing with her dolls in her room, that was it. By the way she’s a really good teacher and excellent doctor. At my wit’s end and needing a nap I talked to my sister, and she made a good point. In the summer time when we are able to go outside and play then come in and do our routine we didn’t have this sleep issue. In the winter time though, we are semi stuck in the house not able to enjoy getting out and putting our energy into running around playing. **LIGHT BULB** I’m always tired after my workout, I get in the tub, which relaxes me, lotion up then off to bed, pending Anissa’s chats I can sleep all night. YAY!! So instead of working out with the ladies 5 times a week I found a similar video on YouTube, comparable to my dance class and Anissa and I dance for an hour. Once that hour is up I strike with the routine. At first  I was skeptical, this was not going to work and now I would be sore and tired. BUT it did, she worked out hard, she loves to dance and before I knew it she could hardly make it to the bath before showing signs of sleepiness. This has gone on for a few weeks and I’m so excited.

So that’s what worked for me. Have you had this issue or know of someone who did? What techniques did they use? List them in the comments in case I need a back-up.

parenting

Being Nanekia…Transparent Moment!

just let me be greatSo let me be all the way honest with you for a moment…February may be the shortest month of the year but I find it to be the most exhausting. It’s like BOOM, I didn’t complete any of my goals in January and now here comes February rearing it’s ugly head to remind me that I should have more accomplished by now. Do you ever feel this way, like you should have more accomplished? I had it all mapped out for January and how I was going to take this year by storm. Then life happened and none of the things I planned came to pass. I was disappointed, how could a whole month just go by and I not be feeling on top of the world. Damn you February how did you get here so fast?!

I know I’m not the only person who has felt this way. But at the time when I’m going through it I want to be selfish and bratty, I want to live in this funk of why me. I want to drown my sorrows in all the foods I love, but I can’t cause in January I told myself I wouldn’t. Why did I do that?! I feel as though life is passing me by and each goal I set I am further and further away from reaching. I’m not sad about it, I’m more pissed off. Why can’t I just pull it together, live this fabulous life and have all these adoring fans. Why can’t February just let me be great damnit.

Reflective Moment: I had to step away from the keyboard for a few seconds, because in the above confession I realized I was getting more frustrated. Not with other people or even February but with myself. It’s my own expectations that have me feeling disappointed, searching for comfort foods and wanting to punch a wall. It’s my own frustrations that prevent me from making the next move, from allowing myself to be vulnerable. It’s ME! February has done nothing wrong. Don’t you hate when you have to grow up and admit that you may be the cause of your own frustrations/problems. UGH, growing pains!

So what can I do…I know I have the answers but it requires me to get on my own damn nerves. I look in the mirror and tell myself the truth. Then I begin to speak LIFE back into my spirit. I remind myself there are more months to come, that there is more living to do, that there are more goals to reach. That I’m the only person that can stop and start me, that these expectations are mine and mine alone and I am the one who can adjust them. I then pop my hair, put on my red lipstick and my 6 inch stilettos and get to work! Simple right? Wrong, I pout for at least 2 more hours, then I got ready.

Are you getting in your own way? Whats’ stopping you from achieving your goals?

parenting

Organize Your Life!

Join me and my Hot Mommies in a new series called HOT MOMMIES GET FIT! We are embracing a healthy lifestyle across all boarders to make sure we are the best we can be. First up is Organize Your Life, featuring Ayesha Ansari. She gives us helpful solutions to help get our lives organized and keep us on track as we live out our dreams and maintain out sanity, Organize Your Life! (click the link!)

HMGT-Organize

parenting

Fairytales Come In Color, BLACK LOVE!

Happy Valentine’s Day! Every year I feature couples that represent Black Love, I’ve witnessed some amazing love stories. I could do a whole series on Black History Facts, but I elect to feature Black Love because frankly, I don’t see enough of it celebrated. There are strong marriages in our communities, their are relationships that have and are still withstanding the test of time. I want my children to see people that look like them in love. I want to give hope to my people that love is still possible and here it is. So enjoy the view, I know I am!

 


veranda and hubby

Baby while we’re young we should just have fun, We should just do whatever we want
And tell everyone that we fell in love with each other, Ooh, that we found the one in one another
While We’re Young, Jhene Aiko

 

 

 

 

 

Altidor

This is not a coincidence
And far more than a lucky chance, But what is that was always meant, Is our ribbon in the sky for our love, love
Ribbon In The Sky- Steven Wonder

 

 

 

cox 1

When all the folks were said and done
You were there to welcome me home
I was convicted cause your love never wavered, I know you love me more than me
And you vowed to love through anything
I never had a kind of love that was forever
Her Heart- Anthony Hamilton

 

vaughns 1


I wanna pull her close to me,
And whisper sweet things in her ear
‘Cause tonight I’m full of fire, baby, And you’re the only one my heart desires
Slow Dance (Hey Mr. DJ)- R. Kelly & Public Announcement

 

 

 

carrolls 1
Here and now

I promise to love faithfully
You’re all I need
Here and now
I vow to be one with thee
Your love is all I need
Here & Now- Luther Vandros

 

 

 

 

IMG_5001[1]

 

I always wanted someone just like you, I really need to hold on, hold you, I’d give the world baby, to you, my darlin’, You know I will
I’ll Give All My Love To You- Keith Sweat

 

 

keisha

 

I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ about you tonight
And all that you mean to me
I used to think I would never fall in love again
I guess I was wrong
Love Calls- Kem


 

 

 

clemonsGirl, you know there ain’t nothin’
I won’t do for you
And baby, don’t, don’t ever
Doubt my love ’cause it’s true
Baby Hold On To Me- Gerald Levert

 

 

 

 

robinsons
When I’m with you, I wonder why

People do stop and stare and smile at us
When I’m with you, the sun shines my way, Baby, our love reflects its rays of light on everyone in the world
With You- Tony Terry

 

teressa and marlon
Fortunate to have you girl,
I’m so glad you’re in my world, Just as sure as the sky is blue
I bless the day that I found you
Fortunate- Maxwell

 

 

 

 

mimi cutelips

The closer I get to you
The more you make me see
By giving me all you’ve got (tell me more)
Your love has captured me
The Closer I Get To You- Beyonce & Luther Vandros

 

 

 

 

deb and hubby
People fall in love in mysterious ways

Maybe just the touch of a hand
Well me, I fall in love with you every single day, I just wanna tell you I am
Thinking Out Loud- Ed Sheeran

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

IMG_5048[1]
I’m so addicted to her she’s the sweetest drug,
Just enough
Still too much say that I’m simp and I’m sprung all of the above, I can’t help she makes me say (Oh oh oh), And I just can’t think (of anything else I’d rather do)
Than to hear you sing (sing my name the way you do)
When we do our thing (when we do the things we do)
Oh, babygirl you make me say (Oh oh oh)
Sexy Love- Ne-yo

 

kiesha

 

I am in love with you
You set me free baby
I can’t do this thing
Called life without you here with me
Cause I’m Dangerously In Love with you
I’ll never leave
Just keep lovin’ me
The way I love you loving me
Dangerously in Love- Beyonce

mcrary

 

 

 

Cherish the day
I won’t go astray
I won’t be afraid
You won’t catch me running
You’re ruling the way that I move
You take my air
You show me how deep love can be
Cherish The Day- Sade

 

 

 

 

 

 

vaughns 2

(Long as I live) Long as I live
You will be (my first love)
Baby, you and only
Long as I live (long as I live)
You will be my first love
And I’ll choose you again
My First Love- Avant feat. Keke Wyatt

 

 

 

 

 
cox 2


Tender love, love so tender

Pulling me close to you, baby, I surrender
Candles they light the dark
Now I see how lovely the feelings are
All the tender love you’ve given to me
Tender Love- Force MD’s

 

 

Carroll's 2
Walks by me everyday

Her and love are the same
The woman that’s stolen my heart
And beauty is her name
Beauty-Dru Hill

 

 
blaney

 

 

 

 

 

See, I don’t need no alcohol
Your love makes me feel ten feet tall
Without it I’d go through withdrawal
Cause nothing even matters, at all
Nothing Even Matters- Lauryn Hill

 

 

 

 


cox 3

And I swear by the moon
And the stars in the sky I’ll be there
I swear like the shadow that’s by your side
I’ll be there for better or worse
Till death do us part
I’ll love you with every beat of my heart, And I swear
I Swear- All-4-One

 

vaughns 3
All I want to do right now is love her down (Ooh)

I don’t give a damn about who hears the sound (Ooh…)
We’ll be in the groove until the sun comes up (Yeah)
Together we’ll get lost inside the love
The Love Scene- Joe

 

 

 

 

 

 

teressa and marlon 2
When I see your face

There’s not a thing that I would change
Cause you’re amazing just the way you are
And when you smile
The whole world stops and stares for a while
Cause, girl, you’re amazing just the way you are
Just The Way You Are- Bruno Mars

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Carroll's 3
It feels so good when I’m with you

Pure ecstasy
It’s just the little things that you do
That makes me want to be right there
When you need
Someone to love
Someone To Love- Mint Condition

 

 

 

daniel

Cause there’s no one in the world to hold me
No one in the world’s gonna move me
No one in the world can love me
Like you do, baby
No One In The World- Anita Baker

 

kiesha 2Love, So many people use your name in vain
Love, Those who faith in you sometimes go astray
Love, Through all the ups and downs the joy and hurt
Love, For better or worse I still will choose you first
Love- Musiq Soul Child

 

IMG_5072[1]

 

Your love is a one in a million, It goes on and on and on, You give me a really good feeling all day long. Your love is a one in a million
It goes on and on and on, You give me a really good feeling all day long.
One In A Million- Aaliyah

Miller
Like the sweet morning dew, I took one look at you

And it was plain to see, you were my destiny
With arms open wide, I threw away my pride
I’ll sacrifice for you, dedicate my life to you
You’re All I Need To Get By- Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell

 

 

 

Nothing has ever felt like this
Nothing has ever meant the whole world to me
Nothing has ever been this good
And nothing has ever been this right
Nothing so sweet
In my life
Nothing Has Ever Felt Like This- Rachelle Ferrell & Will Downing