My friend Keisha embarked on a journey with her daughters to “Dreamsville.” If you are like Keisha, this took a lot of planning, sleepless nights, and mini battles to ensure her children would have an amazing time. Often we as moms are so wrapped up in planning these moments for everyone else that we rarely enjoy them for ourselves. Nobody gets to see all the behind-the-scenes. I imagine Keisha’s heart filled with joy as she organized her girls for these pics. As Keisha described her adventures with her girls to our group chat (If you are a child reading this, yes, your mom has a whole group chat outside the family one), we realized how fleeting these moments are and how important it is for us to be present in them. As much as we like to take pictures and post them to our social media, we all agree there are more pictures in our camera rolls that no one but us will ever see. Those stolen moments when your family doesn’t realize you are watching, but you see them as imperfect as they are, you know they are yours.   

Becoming a mom was one of my greatest joys! You don’t realize it until you look into the eyes of the little person that makes you a mom and notice they have become your whole world. And then, life hits, and you wonder how you could have lost yourself in someone else’s life. What happened to you as a woman, as an individual? Do you still have a name?

I know a lot of moms who are currently under some form of construction figuring out who they are as themselves and as a mom. I want to tell you this is normal. We are ever-evolving, and just because you have the responsibility of another person does not mean you are not still growing up yourself. We all will forever have room to grow. 

For the kid watching your mom go through changes, know this, she loves you more than words could ever express. She has captured you on your good and bad days. She is your greatest cheerleader and corrects you in love. On this Mother’s Day, remember to show her some grace. Growth is not easy for any of us, but it is necessary.