Okay ladies, you heard from some of your sista friends (well at least my sista friends) a few days ago about why they are not married. Me being who I am wanted to find out what the fellas had to say. So sit back, sip whatever drink you have and read on.
The question posed to these awesome guys was “What stops you from popping the question?” I asked a variety so that we could get some insight, from the white collar to the blue collar, from thug life, to hustle man, to wall street, see their top 10 reason listed below.
- They want to prove to her family and friends that they can take care of her and deserve their respect. Most feel they need to prove to the family that they are worthy of the woman’s time and attention.
- Guys have a hard time expressing emotions. When they actually find the one, it’s hard to believe you actually found her, the one. The task of trying to express your love and asking her to be your wife is nerve wrecking.
- FINANCES!!! Families cost money. If they don’t feel they can provide a great life for her, then they won’t ask. Some admitted that they want to give their future wife the option to not work if she chooses, and in order to that their finances must be in order.
- Overthinking is a dream killer for most of us. This plays a role in why they are not popping the question. They may know that she love them and they love her, but can either of them truly commit to this for a lifetime and if they do commit for a lifetime, will life be boring, and if life becomes boring how will they get the excitement back, will they go elsewhere, will she go elsewhere. You get it, overthinking.
- Fear of commitment! Along with overthinking you begin to wonder about if you can really be monogamous. Is there really one woman for each man? Am I a man that can commit to this? Forever is a really long time.
- Pride! I love and know me. I AM THE MAN!!! Will she realize all that she is getting and appreciate it?! I trust and know me and that I’m living a good life, can she keep up?!
- Women who press to get married and have a family are a turn off. There is a natural progression to getting to the point of him popping the question. If you press them about it the more they want to pull away from you and your interest in marriage. If on the second date you are asking about their sperm count, you can count them out.
- Men need support. We live in a society where woman are being liberated from the oppressor and so they receive an enormous amount of support from everywhere. Men are considered the oppressor and therefore why should she feel like she should support me, it’s her time to shine, he needs to take a backseat. If she can’t realize that I want to support her and I want her to support me as well, then there’ no point in discussing marriage. She has to be willing to cheer for me, like I’m cheering for her, even if it requires for her to just hold the bench down.
- Tired of the games. He needs to know who this woman is outside the waist trainer, eye lashes, weave, and make-up (apparently some of them are watching the YouTube tutorials with us). Once a man crosses the line with you and decides to commit to dating only you, they want to know who you really are, flaws and all. As much as almost ALL admitted to double tapping on IG models, but that’s not what they are looking for in a real relationship and if they have to play games to figure out who you are, then it’s just not worth it.
- Ultimately they ALL agreed that guys know what they want. If your guy is not talking marriage with you or appears uninterested when you bring it up, more than likely they are not interested in marriage with you. If marriage is on their mind they will discuss.
Well ladies, there you have it, a few answers as to why he may not be popping the questions. What are your thoughts? Do you need to re-evaluate your current situation?