- You’ll find someone someday.
(response: Don’t you think I already know that!)
- Mr./Mrs. Right is being prepped for you.
(response: Well make sure they’re well done this time)
- I’ve got just the right person for you, my niece/nephew is single too.
(response: Does my shirt say desperately seeking?!)
- When are you getting married?
(response: If I knew that, I would have sent out “Save the dates” by now to avoid you asking this question, again!)
- Whatever happened to so and so?
(response: If you don’t see them around then apparently we ain’t together!)
- You’re not getting any younger!
(response:**ding, ding** You are correct! I don’t suffer from that Benjamin Button disease)
- You can always get a pet.
(response: Well just go ahead put me in the housecoat, slippers, cigarettes, bonnet and deem me that cat lady)
- I pray you find someone soon.
(response: While you’re praying, please ask for deliverance from put foot in mouth disease!)
- Have you tried online dating?
(response: No, but thanks grandma for creating that profile and stressing that I am in desperate need!)
- Maybe you should fix yourself up.
(response: So, you think I’m trying to fix myself down?!)
- You’ll find someone when you least expect it.
(response: Well hopefully I’m fixed up by then! (reference #10))
- Your standards are too high.
(response: So you’re saying I should take practices personal hygiene off the table?!)
- Hopefully we’ll be planning your wedding soon.
(response: And your funeral next!)
- As a virgo you should really be looking for a cancer as a match?
(response: And in what bible did you find this compatibility chart?!)
- There’s someone out there for everyone.
(response: Apparently so, someone found you.)
- If all else fails, at least you have family.
(response: Well, damn that is a depressing thought!)
- What happened to (insert ex’s name here), I mean he/she left you in debt but he/she had some pretty teeth?
(response: Well there you have it, hopefully great dental hygiene will pay our mortgage someday.)
- Remember when you were 10 years old and you and (insert childhood friend’s name here) said you were going to get married, what happened?
(response: We did this thing called “GROW UP”)
- Back in high school everybody thought you would be the first to get married. (response: Back in high school I had no standards!)
- You just need to put yourself out there.
(response: So, mom, you hanging that desperately seeking a date for my son/daughter sign ain’t getting the response you expected, huh?!)
Just kidding! It’s all in fun and sarcasm. Have a Happy Valentine’s Day!